we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
My roommate just caught me cleaning a tostitos queso jar with my hand and eating it. He didn't judge. Bonding moment.
For breaking and entering. I think neighbor dan cared more about me puking in his backseat than the surprise of me waking up there
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
Yes, you can glue plastic eyes to my dick and take pictures while I'm asleep. If you tell anyone I said you could do that Ima fight you.
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
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