so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
I like it when Amish boys stare at my boobs, even tho I can't tell if it's in appreciation or disgust. Rumspringa, mothafuckers.
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
I feel like I'm in a astronaut outfit like I'm a spaceman & I'm just floating around cause that's all you do in space is float and I'm floating to be in detail
Houston we have a problem
I sort of feel bad for this orthodontist. The things that have been in my mouth in the past 12 hours aren't exactly socially acceptable.
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