Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
my mom said i couldn't bring cigarettes cause it was a family trip, which was really irresponsible of her because now i have to walk around the beach drunk trying to find someone with cigarettes.
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
What was the name of the cook I had sex with at Famous Dave's?
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
I got a message the other day that just said “great tits”
A gentleman AND a scholar
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
Hey, um, after thinking about it, I decided I really don't want to use applying olive oil to your ass for your fissure as part of foreplay because... well... really? Just read that again.
Randomize
