She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
Also, I'm sewing my entire Halloween costume by hand. I better get laid at every single party I go to.
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
it looks like my getting laid tonight is going to depend on my knowledge of native birds. this is a weird party
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
Oh and it’s been a year according to my snap chat memories since I banged your cousin in your sons truck pulled over on Elm St! 😂😂😂😬😳😇
I went next door to get a can opener from them. They opened the door shirtless, asked me if I wanted to a smoke a joint with them. Then decided to make blueberry smoothies. But the yogurt in the blender & the berries, got confused when the berries blended into the yogurt and just kept adding more. Only stopped when we ran out of berries.
Randomize
