This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
I have the sudden urge to buy a Snuggie and wear it to the grocery store.
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
I just stuffed five dollars in my near empty box of camels to remind myself to buy more. And my mom says I don't budget my money
He's like the fucking Houdini of bras. Not only did I not feel him take it off I didn't find it until two days later.
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
I feel like I should come with a warning like "Orgasm free since 1983"
Managed to discreetly puke out of a moving streetcar window, in front of no less than a dozen people. Nobody saw/said anything. I feel like a legit local now.
Back of his car in the Starbucks parking lot WITH HIS APRON STILL ON. Check and Mate.
Holy shit. You won barista bingo AND the Triple Crown in one day.
It's gotten so bad I typed my will out on my phone in case it's over.
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
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