The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
I love having hate sex.
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
I miss the time when Mondays weren't the new Thursdays. I can't drink like my 17 year old self anymore.
It's now 8:05 on a Wednesday night and I'm already going home with my bra in my purse.
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
Dude I'm about to just roll over and piss off the side of my bed, rather than make the conscious effort to get up and walk to the bathroom. One of those hangovers.
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
In other news, people don't judge you when you buy a vibrator if you buy a funny birthday card and bag with it. I learned that this weekend.
why the fuck is there hamburger meat in the toaster. i repeat: WHY THE FUCK IS THERE HAMBURGER MEAT IN MY NEW TOASTER
Remember that one time you told the bartender he was fuckable? Well, he's here.
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