love makes seman taste better
hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
I drew you a picture of Jesus holding hands with Frida Kahlo as a token of my gratitude
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
I'm too drunk to make ramen. What the fuck is this.
Randomize
