I'm really into asian looking animals
Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
Why did I wake up with "How to masturbate" on my youtube search bar?
You told us you forgot how, and started to cry.
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
How many people can say they've shit on the floor of a five star hotel?
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
He told me my outfit made me look like a twelve year old then proceeded with "but you don't look like a whore"
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
Randomize
