Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
The nun costume is coming back hard and it still has glitter and the smell of Vegas on it.
Best. Text. Ever.
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
Randomize