If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
He came in like 30 seconds. That's how I know he hasn't been cheating on me while I've been gone
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
My fridge broke, and apparently the back is missing. The repair guy just fixed it with a pizza box. I didn't ask where the box came from, but it wasn't mine. Reason #20 why rent is cheap.
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
Ten
The guy in the cage next to me is having phone sex. His girlfriend is in College Library. Why is my life ridiculous.
Randomize
