The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
The best way to start drinking is as early as possible. eg, this bar isn't open but we're patiently waiting outside. That way you're confident and exciting when the talent arrives. Or too drunk to care.
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
How much weight does it take to launch a cat using a trebuchet vs the tension required for a catapult?
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
In other news, the one guy I DIDN'T have sex with in High School is now famous.
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
Randomize
