Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
When he was fat he reminded me of my high school best friend and I just wanted to hug him and hug him. Also, he's funny and humor is the fastest way into my pants after Doctor Who and liquor.
Dumb decision of the night...walking home drunk and smelling my pepper spray
Trying to figure out what I just puked. Demon weed is salad. No more drunk buffets.
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
You should frame my arrest warrant.
Remember earlier when I was excited about finding that birth control pill in my purse? Definitely acid.
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
Randomize
