I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
I know its hard to believe that I'm already drunk at 12 p.m. but I am, so dont call me asking to go to the gym.
Some chick just tried to plug her vodka into the wall.
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
Randomize
