why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
surgery went fine. i cant breath out of my right nostril though. lets not eat peas anymore when we are drunk.
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
She's got a butler. A fucking butler. Shes like batman, but with a better ass.
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
Oh I'm sorry does your girlfriend send you better pictures of things in her ass? No? Didn't think so. Remember that the next time you wanna complain how I don't make the first move enough.
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
Randomize
