i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
Nothing quite like coming out of an alcohol induced blackout walking down Spruill Avenue carrying a silver briefcase full of IT tools you don't know where they came from. This is my life.
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
Your Vodka Saturday privileges have been reduced to Beer until you go a full month without losing an article of clothing.
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
Apparently I handcuffed myself to the dishwasher...
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
Wandering around the streets of Baltimore at two in the afternoon. Just offered a job as a stripper. Think I should accept?
Try an internship first, see if you enjoy it.
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