You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
I just almost got out my car and drop kicked this one chick over parking. Welcome to the first day of spring semester.
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
I didn't know whether to laugh at the fact that a dog bit his balls or throw up cause my dad was telling me a story involving his balls.
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
Woke up in the middle of my kitchen clutching a cheesy gordita crunch
Uhhh...I just found your 10 dollar bill in my bra. I owe you 10 dollars.
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
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