He asked me how my body knew that a month was up when it was time for my period.
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
My middle name is suave and my vagina shoots rainbows, what else would you expect?
I can't figure out if I'm dying from all of the booze still in my system, or from the cement wall.
I successfully convinced a drunk NDSU student that their school does not have a football team and another that they weren't in Fargo. I'm a dangerous sober shark in a sea of drunks.
Sex on the scooter in the parking lot wasn't the smartest idea. Actual quote from the cop as he handed me the ticket and fist bumped me.
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
We really gotta wear capes to the bar more often...
Your parents are gone and we haven't fucked in their bed... why?
Randomize
