We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
nothing makes up for a small, perpetually flaccid penis quite like a British accent
Dude I think I was making out with the cat last night
I don't have a cat..?
Well nonetheless. Whatever it was purred when I used tounge.
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
I forgot to tell you, wear something you can puke on Saturday. We're christening this marriage with a shot of jager. NOT KIDDING.
My new roommate just announced that she got her period, popped a percoset, smoked a bowl, and started playing a video game. She says she's not moving till it's over. New hero?
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
Randomize
