let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.
beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
that was after you ironed the burrito. didn't leave much cheese on the ironing board though
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
You told me that they girl who was giving you a handjob under the table looked a little like your sister
On second thought, is it weird that I scheduled a surgery that determines my fertility around lingerie football night? I might have fucked up priorities.
Absolutely not. I would have done the exact same thing.
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
If you ever feel goofy just think of the fact that I just shaved the batman symbol into my pubes
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
Randomize
