What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
Sorry I didn't text you for coffee this morning...bad life decision Saturday sorta rolled into Monday...
You had one beer and one beer can full of vodka and you took a huge gulp of one of them and called it Emily Roulette
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
Went to work in the same clothes from last night, completely covered in glitter...I didn't choose the hag life, the hag life chose me
Just got a snapchat from him that was a video of with the caption "my new apartment" in Brazil. I think we might not be seeing eachother anymore.
We kinda got asked to leave the strip club and on the way out, you fell again. When you finally got up we got a standing ovation from the girls behind the bar and you took a bow. It was awesome.
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
Almost gave myself a concussion stealing a stuffed unicorn hanging on a street sign but hey I got home safe
My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic
Randomize
