well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
Things bear mace does not do: repel bears. Things bear mace does do: piss off bears, give bystanders asthma attacks. Lesson learned
i get drunk faster, i spend less money on food, and i'm losing a shit ton of weight. depression and its pills are doing wonders for me
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
Just called a girl a cunt over peanuts. I think we both know it wasn't just about the peanuts.
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
Randomize
