White coat. Heels.
just caught my little brother jacking off the family pet
No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
For future reference, even the most well-intentioned game of whiskey pong is a terrible idea.
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
The power of my boobs compel you
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
Randomize
