In honor of tonight, my penis will make an appearance
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
Found him. He was passed out on the couch at the new place in a room full of burnt pizza smoke.
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
So you met him?
More like I walked in on him, drunk, naked, and doing "bathtub yoga". Please stop bringing your dates home.
seis de mayo is my least favoite holiday because i usually spend it in bed sobbing over my poor life decisions from the night before.
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
Also I know you probably did not understand anything I said on the phone last night but thank you for pretending.
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
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