That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
it's great music for shaving your balls
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
you started looking at my couch laughing and saying to it "she thinks I'm talking to you" then proceeded to laugh and talk to the couch some more.
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
I just googled, "what type of cured meat does my face taste like", and one of the top results was, "The Definitive Guide to Bacon." I couldn't make this up if I tried.
if happy hour never ends, you’ll never have to eat kale
You know you're high when you find yourself sitting on the floor with the refrigerator door open, talking to various foods. Hand gestures and all.
Randomize
