Turn sideways at McDonald's = actual directions to a winery
All my problems are solved. I just got McDonalds and scratch off lottery tickets.
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
I literally told her "she's a sandwich I'd like to make" and that's all it took
Just woke up with an eye that wont open, a half eaten piece of pizza on my chest and a raging boner.
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
Randomize