Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
rhymes with "ouble enetration"
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
my roommate just caught me washing a dildo in the sink.
I consider it a successful poop when you only have to wipe once.
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
We're making herpes jokes very loudly and hoping she notices.
Just remembered seeing jalepenos in my vomit last night. Reminded me to thank you for sharing your queso with me. You're a good friend.
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
... Cuz there's nothing like having your two male roommates catching you have a good cry in the driveway at 9am on a Wednesday.
Grindr hookup awareness: always make sure that you agree to blow one person and they aren't bringing a Friend/boyfriend. Shits weird when you're sober.
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
Randomize
