Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
I forgot to ask you how long you're housesitting. By which I mean how many bones can I get in averaging 2.5 bones per day.
20.
He offered to take me to my appointment after breakfast then kind of just sat there and watched me get a papsmier. Most awkward first date ever.
Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals!
Just got a motivational speech from the tacobell drive thru guy at 2am
I JUST BROKE A NAIL MASTURBATING. WTF I could even enjoy my orgasm bc now I'm gonna have to spend $50 on my nails.
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
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