Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
My last google search was "mavis beacon techs tping" Thank god google auto corrects bc otherwise i wouldn't know that i drunk-type 13 words a minute.
Just found out my mom's voicemail password is 6969..
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
You'd be surprised at how many crooked penises are out there
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
random memory from the wedding, the bartender show us how to open the windows of the hotel and pee out of them
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
Thought for a game. Duck, Duck, Grey Goose. If you're tapped, you take a shot. Then proceed as normal.
Randomize
