Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
My roommate threw his shoe through our window and I came out of my blackout kicking holes in my wall. Pretty sure Edward 80 Hands won't be happening anymore.
Just saw a hooker eating a pastrami sandwich walking down beach blvd blowing kisses to traffic. My day = made
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
Damn why is there no horse blowjob emoji?
what's the proper way to say, "I'm sorry for puking on you and your bed mid hook up then going downstairs and fucking your roommate because you locked me out of your room completely naked...?"
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
I was afraid she wouldn't be able keep up but I woke up in a bathtub, she called me a pussy and made me pancakes.
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
Are you hungover?
No. I'm hiding under my covers and hoping it doesn't find me.
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