yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
Just got a blowjob to the theme of Bohemian Rhapsody as the sun was rising. I should just kill myself because ill never top this moment.
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
Btw, do you want me to fix this with a box of wine and a chick flick or is this more of a 'lets head to the strip club' problem? I'm just trying to analyze the emotional depth of the situation.
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
Can we please start going to the gym before I accidentally kill someone via explosive fat girl pants button accident
You know.... I ordered the nipple clamps when I was drunk. But on further consideration, THANKS DRUNK ME I LIKE WHATS HAPPENING
I managed to get through my meeting without throwing up in someone else's office, so there's that for an accomplishment today.
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
Randomize
