Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
He kept insisting that I was going to have an orgasm but it just felt like he was rubbing sand paper on my vagina
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
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