Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
He about cried when I ordered pizza online. He said it was a miracle.
You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
The last mom I slept with was the worst lay ever. Imagine fucking a hairy wet pillow for 60 minutes. Good luck with your milf. I was joking about the Susan Boyle comment btw.
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
I need to pay that drinking in public ticket, but I also really want to get a spray tan next week... so priorities.
Is it bad that when someone says the phrase "helicopter dick" I immediately think of you?
I woke up to some strange woman rubbing peanut butter on my thighs
Waking up next to a guy you don't remember going home with and the first thing you say is: where is my tiara? = successful birthday
it's not rock bottom until you fall down an escalator on the way home from a hookup and have to have you dad come pick your drunkass up at 3am. Adulthood.
You're lucky I just like fucking you because you would really suck at being a boyfriend.
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