I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
he has a girlfriend so we used my stuffed animals to pretend to have sex
I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
Dude I woke up in her bed wearing a top hat and bunny slippers and noticed one of us had pissed in bed. The last thing I wanted to ask for was a ride home
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
...take a good look at your butthole.... then try matching it to any paint color on the Benjamin Moore color wheel....not gonna happen...
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
I just bought condoms and a potted plant, making for a top ten super weird and awkward purchase.
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