Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
I just smoked a bowl in the dining room and am now drinking a glass of chocolate milk. i can't believe i'm getting paid for this.
I already brushed my teeth, and it's not even noon yet. Today's going to be a productive day.
I told her that I thought she needed an oral mammogram. With me being pre-med she bought it.
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
My friend Julia's mom just called her to say she got a puzzle in the mail made of cheese and when she put it together it spelled FUCK YOU and she doesn't know who it's from.
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
Um. I just realized I still have a beer in my purse from last night. I'm at work. I am so classy.
Randomize
