I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
Do you participate in Sunday morning booty calls?
Dammit! I didn't see this message, of course I do.
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
Randomize
