we're blogging at a bar
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
I wish there was a lawn mower version of Roomba so I could just drink and cheer it on from the stoop.
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
Hungover, threw up in a cosmetic case in my car this morning. This is real life.
My rule for unemployment is that I can't smoke before noon.
I haven't gotten up before 1 though, so it hasn't really impacted me.
I just spent 12 consecutive hours in the same outfit and none of it was pajamas. If that's not personal growth, I don't know what is.
i need some magic done to my vagina
I'm sorry that running around town like a frenetic wombat trying to find you KY jelly isn't good enough for you.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
Dicks are not precious.
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
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