his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
I may or may not have just ruined a marriage. But in my defense I got all my drinks for free tonight.
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
I didn't know what to say so I just sent him a chicken emoji
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
His wife isn’t coming to the wedding! I’ve got 48 hours to home wreck him. Gotta go, I have to shave my vajayjay and buy some really slutty underwear. Love you!
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize
