How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
I just dropped my cookie in my glass of milk and looked at it for ten minutes. Thanks for telling me you made weed cookies.
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
I feel like we should build an island for girls that have committed atrocious numbers of unforgivable sins. We'll call it 'whore island' after the anchorman fashion.
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
You didn't say, "No." And you stole more than half of my Snickers. You owed me that dick.
So that 100 days of sobriety thing I told you about last week? Lasted all of 4 days. Fuck it, life's too short
So here's my pathetic thought of the day: what does it smell like to be sober?
Driving from bar to bar trying to recover all of the possessions I've drunkenly lost over the course of the past few nights. Actual nadir of my life and absolute height of shamblyness.
Props for using the word nadir
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
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