For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
last night they convinced you that a sharpie was a new style of chap stick... so when you wake up, you might want to do something about that
Um I just overheard that the new guy spent a month in jail. Obvi another great hire.
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
He's such a gentleman. He didn't even ask why my bra was flung on the seat of my car. He just took my snow brush, pushed it onto the floor and said, "Let's go I'm hungry."
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
I told him to take his man panties off and take the fucking Jaeger bomb already, so no to a 2nd date
Randomize
