Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
I need to talk about my life with someone. Preferably with someone who hasn't tried to jizz on me
Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
Had a crazy moment last night. Had to get up, run to bathroom, pop 3 Xanax, sit on bathroom floor and rock myself in fetal position. Not my best moment.
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
Randomize
