YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
I went to go pee and found a strand of your hair wrapped around my penis.
They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
She makes walking on a treadmill look like a porno. I wish I could send over shots as an ice breaker.
That's effing brilliant. We should start a business.
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
This can only be settled by a dance off.
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
Randomize
