You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
So...i'm having a drinking contest, my right hand vs my left, i have a feeling the 24 pack is gonna win
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
Im pretty sure it started going awry when I asked their mom "How much would it cost me to sleep with your daughters"
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
Our love of vodka is more proof than a maternity test
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
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