True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
I'm eating my dinosaur chicken nuggets in the order they would die in the food chain.
you walked into the kitchen holding the skyy bottle and asked us "how do i warm this?"
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
I shit myself. Legit. And I burnt my tongue. Unrelated incidents, but related in the sense of general discomfort.
Licking pop rocks off a stranger's washboard abs and kissing strangers young enough to be my kid. Yeah, it was THAT kind of party last night
I just closed two deals on my laptop from my bathroom while smoking a bowl, like a bawssss. Working from home is my favorite.
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
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