Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
went to the bathroom to piss, saw puke in the toilet thought wtf i dont remember puking, then turned around to find a chick i've never seen before passed out in my shower.
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
Randomize
