It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
I vaguely remember Matt shouting something about "GET ON MY LEVEL!" at the bartender before he attempted to order a case of tequila from him.
When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.
He ripped off my pantyhose and all I could think was, "oh no those were clinic-appropriate!" That's what I get for ditching a continuing education meeting to go hook up with my scuba instructor.
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
I just love that it's Veterans Day because I know in my heart that I have serviced some of their brethren in the dirtiest, hottest, most shameful ways possible.
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
Yeah, let's go with that. Fuck that weak moment of complete honesty I just had.
Randomize
