i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
One of my friends took me out last night for a bday celebration and I just now remembered that a man blew fire balls across the bar in honor of my birthday... How drunk do you have to be to forget that?
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
I just almost puked & then I panicked and forced it back down because I thought I would be a waste of the apple turnover I ate.. I'm that hungover
Omg I can't even...
That moment when I wear the same thing I did to a motel nooner to my family's Christmas party... Ho Hoety Ho bitches
The fact that you got a stranger guy to buy you a pizza off tinder makes me feel amazing
I thought if I bought the most expensive pregnancy test I would look like I had my life together
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
Is texting an old booty call with "can you still get your ankles behind your ears?" an appropriate way to reemerge into the singles scene???
Randomize