It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
vagina is talking i cant
how do i say, "my ex is going to be at this party so don't look like shit" without sounding like a bitch?
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
Serio, who the fuck falls down coming offstage wearing nothing but pasties, a g-string, and a fake moustache, and now suddenly needs a tetanus shot. Me. That's who.
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
Literally told everyone you're my idol cause you ate a chicken nugget off a sword
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
You’re better off without him. Actually, he’s better off without you and that’s what really matters
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
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