I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
It's like Facebook knows when I'm about to masturbate and tells me to reconnect with exes.
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
Well now I have my semen on her headphones
I think you begin to realize how unfair life really is when you're high and you discover that the new box of fruit by the foot on your shelf is actually empty
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
How could you not respond to a text containing the words "goat man" ?!?
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
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