Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
Life Lesson #1 of 2013: double-fisting shower beers and shaving my bikini line should be reserved for two different showers.
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
I just came so hard my vision went blurry. I can only hope one day I'll find a man that can accomplish what my left hand does on a tri-daily basis.
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
Knowing how to carefully mix my vices has to be the #1 skill I've gotten from pharmacy school
maybe i should limp back to therapy...
oh yeah will you also bring home vodka i wanna do shots on the roof
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
Randomize
