when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
You just sat there staring at your apple and saying "I'm so glad you're here" to it every time you took a bite.
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
I called him the wrong name all night, yet I still got a ride home from the party and hooked up with the guy. I'm irresistible.
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